Donald Trump’s Book Reviews!

9 Mar

This Buzzfeed article using Donald Trump’s Twitter writing style to review famous books is hilarious! I’ve been inspired to write several of my own reviews in Trump Twitterspeak. See what you think!

Brideshead Revisted: Loser Charles Ryder falls in love with a rich gay drunk, then gets dumped by the drunk’s sister. Pathetic!

The Great Gatsby: Dummy Jay Gatsby wastes five years pining for a selfish bimbo who only cares about herself.
His pink suits are a disgrace!

The Shining: Weirdo kid’s family moves into a creepy deserted hotel, then his dad goes apeshit.
Wouldn’t happen in a Trump hotel!

Lord of the Flies: Spoiled Limey brats get marooned on an island and worship a dead pig. Then they kill each other. Boring!

For Whom the Bell Tolls: Loser Robert Jordan fights for Spanish Commies, then gets wasted on a hill.
I respect the ones who didn’t get killed!

The Grapes of Wrath: Dummy Joad family moves to California expecting primo wages for farm work.
Then they find out it was a lie. Should have stayed in Oklahoma!

Madame Bovary: Greedy French bimbo cheats on her dopey doctor husband, then bankrupts him.
He should have gotten a good pre-nup like me!

The Canterbury Tales: A bunch of Limey losers gather at an inn and tell each other their life stories–boring. Dopey Chaucer couldn’t even speak real English!

Gone With the Wind: Dummy Scarlett O’Hara pines for dopey Ashley for years. She’s too dumb to see that Rhett Butler is her true love. I wouldn’t date her!

Little Women: Four penniless girls and their mom struggle to survive while their dad is away at war.
Marmee should have dumped the deadbeat dad and married rich old Mr. Laurence!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: